today is the most fruitful day that i ever thought or imagine about it. finally stepped out of my home.. a day i look forward. yup.

started out with my cousin's ROM. they're so sweet la! gosh! i like wad she was wearing. the barbie doll of the day. hahaaa... man, and her husband was like saying i dun look like my age! O!!! hmmmmmm... need to work on this. anw, they're really sweet loving couple. hope they last for a lifetime, loving as though it was their 1st love.

after that, i went to visit my granny at the hospital. met my kor, saw my cousin, and a cousin whom i haven seen for a long time..... ok! he's gonna work in new york how cool is that!!!!? man, i sure do want to work there someday.

i caught the glimpse of my cousin's stare... somehow, it reminded alot of things... how i was so provoke to make sure that i do up to a expectation, doing well acadamically... hmmm, i did it halfway... but somehow, the kind of provocation jus seems to disappear... in short, i dun wanna loose out in any ways... (although sometimes i do feel inferior abt myself... )

then again, come to think of it, when was the last time i actually enjoyed wad i learn in the midst of having pressure??? when was the last time that i didnt feel the stress in doing anything??? when was the last time i thought to myself that per can do it??? when was the last time that i make a stand that i really really can do it????

hmmmm... especially when a cousin of mine ask me this, " wad you want to be after you graduate???" i replied, "to be a graphic designer"

ok, that sets me thinking.... somehow, things are starting to get clearer...

i asked myself, wad have i exactly done for the past semester?????

all i hope now, is to survive the next semester... not just in surviving mode... i need to be clear, to manage my time well too... all i hope, that this month, im able to polish up wadever areas that im weak in.

thoughts:
it felt as though i fell so hard into the pit
it felt that the mind was totally chaotic
it felt that a hefty pressure was on it
still a pressure can be a good pressure in the way it is view
it felt as though that at the point of time
im so in need of You
yet
it always take a 180 degree turn to see that there is a light of hope in there
doesnt it make sense to me?
it was there all along
yet
i fail to see
till
i looked at what was OVERLOOKED

pretty much, i hope... things, circumstances will be pulled through